family

10 Self Defeating Behaviors to Dump in the New Year

1. The additive use of food.

The emotional addiction to food is something to look at as the New Year approaches us. People can be addicted to sugar and carbs, which gives them a temporary comfort but eventually causes severe mood swings. If you are eating too much or too little and are not maintaining a healthy weight, it I’d important to connect with your doctor or nutritionist on a solid plan that works best with your lifestyle. I personally have found that the Whole30 diet it great to detox from sugar, and the Paleo diet is a great way to continue the sugar free lifestyle. Excessive sugar can cause long term health problems and can alter you state of mind negatively. If you are experiencing a surplus or lack of need to eat it is best to contact your doctor for further instruction on self care.

2. The additive use of entertainment.

Our phones, televisions, iPads, laptops and other screen around our house can easily become an addiction when bored. If you are consuming more than 2 to 3 hours a day, it may not be healthy on your eyes and your overall health. You can monitor you time online by timing yourself and clocking yourself in when you start, and clocking yourself out when you are done. It is good to monitor video time as it can fully consume us all, and drive us a little nutty.

3. Dishonesty, exaggerating, lying, and stealing are all signs of self sabotage.

Do you find yourself lying to family, friends, and strangers alike? If you have a compulsive need to lie to make yourself look better or make someone else look worse, you may want to check yourself before you wreck yourself dude. Exaggerating, lying and stealing are all self destructive behaviors that can be easily healed with therapy or a 12 step program.

4. You often have work problems and take unnecessary legal action on others where you fail to take accountability for yourself.

Many of us hate our bosses, but do you find yourself always having major personality conflicts with coworkers? If so, there are ways to set boundaries and care for yourself.

5. You enjoy blaming your problems on politics, friends, and school.

We are all human and face the trouble of surviving in this weird world of ours, but blaming politics, friends, or your school for other issues like unemployment is counterproductive. The media is not to blame for you having financial issues. Let’s be honest with ourselves and work on building better lives rather than pulling third parties into the situation that have nothing to do with your current state.

6. You have irritability online and take pride in mistreating people.

Mistreatment is more a reflection on the bully rather than the victim. However, it is the victims job to stand up for himself when being mistreated. Sometimes people can blame Peter for Paul’s handiwork. Let’s make sure we treat all with respect and keep calm while carrying on.

7. You have the tendency to attract troubled partners and friends that drive high levels of drama and conflict.

You are the company you keep. If you have a tendency to attract trouble, you may need to broaden your social groups to those that are more aligned with who you want to be. Having high standards for friends and partners is key, as you can’t choose your family.

8. You abuse and oversexualize others and have inappropriate boundaries.

Boundaries are tough but necessary especially in the age of social media where everyone you turn to could be filming your every move. Having appropriate boundaries with others is key to having healthy, consensual relationships.

9. You go into total avoidance of people, participation, and engage in emotional anorexia.

Avoiding people because you are fearful or scared is common in folks with anxiety and depression. It is a hard year but really important to try and be social with others. You can create zoom hangouts, social distancing meet ups, and always use a mask especially when you are not feeling well.

10. You tend to repeat traumatic problems and often are getting into trouble or weird situations.

We all have problems, but it is when we repeat those mistakes again and again is where we have the issue of insanity. Insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting a different outcome. If you tend to repeat the same mistakes again and again, you may want to consider getting help with a 12 step progam.

What self defeating behaviors do you want to trash in the New Year?

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