We all get there sometimes. Our complex mind gets a complete hold over us and our moods go down the drain. Sometimes it’s like our worst enemies take over our mind and tell us horrible things that are not real and are also not very nice. Would you talk the way you talk to your best friend the same way your mind talks to itself?

The answer is no.

Here is our list to help you combat and finally defeat your negative self talk, and start loving yourself again.

  • AWARENESS – This is the first step to defeating the negative self talk. You realize that you are in a bad mood. You become aware of it. You know your worst enemy self talk exists. You realize that what is happening is not actually real. You call it out and understand that it exists.
  • REALIZATION – You realize that the negative self talk is hurting your daily life. The negative self talk turns out to be lies. They are not real. The negative self talk doesn’t serve you, and has a very negative impact on your daily life.
  • CHALLENGE – You can challenge the negative talk by combating it with positive reinforcements or contrary action. For example, your mind may tell you something like: ‘Wow, you really suck at that. You’ll never amount to anything.’ You can combat it by doing or saying contrary action like this: ‘No one is perfect. You are learning something new. You may not be great at it now, but if you practice you’ll get better at it. Practice makes perfect.’
  • BE YOUR OWN COACH – Let your inner coach step in. Let the coach run your mind. Let the coach be gentle with you and them be your own cheerleader.
  • BE PRESENT – Be where your feet are. When I am really into my negative self talk, I realize that I am not in the moment. Sometimes I perseverate on the future and get focused and zoned into the past. The reality is the past is gone and the future will always be unknown. Even when you prep the best you can for the future, the universe may have other plans. Accept the now and stay in it as best as you can.
  • TABLE IT – Tabling negative self talk means putting it on the shelf. Keep it in storage for later. Come back to it tomorrow. Come back to it tonight. Write it on a post it note. Think about how it affects you and go with it.
  • CURB PREDICTING DISASTERS – It is good to listen to your intuition, but intuition is different then playing out unnecessary horror stories on worse case scenarios constantly. You are as safe as you allow your mind to be, and if your life is in immediate threat call the authorities, i.e. 911, cops, ambulance, your therapist, a friend or family member.
  • KNOW THAT ONE BAD MOMENT IN YOUR LIFE DOESN’T DEFINE YOU AS A PERSON – Bad things happen to good people. It is a natural part of life. It doesn’t define you. Let it serve as a lesson. In life we have many lessons. We learn from them, and we move on. You don’t need to let past mistakes define who you are today.
  • YOU ARE NOT A SAINT – No one is. We are not perfect. We don’t have to be. Perfection is an illusion that we create. Know that you are usually not who you say you are or think you are. Be you.
  • LOVE YOURSELF – This means to take great care of yourself. This means eating well, cutting out the negative self talk and self sabotage, respecting your boundaries, and loving yourself the way a parent or God loves you. You are a child of GOD. Remember that.
  • KEEP THE FOCUS ON YOU – Trying to fix others can be a full time job in itself. You cannot change anyone but yourself. Keep the focus on you and the rest will fall into place according to God’s plan.
  • APPRECIATE YOUR TRIGGERS – Triggers are future lessons, and life is a series of tests and lessons set up for us to learn as much as we can.

When you change the way you think, you change the way you feel.

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