Oh boy, sometimes it is really hard for me to listen especially when I am bored with the speaker. I find that my mind wanders very quickly and the only way I can pay attention is by thinking about the other things I need to get done in the day.
As I age, I realize that I can actually getting more patient and sit with myself. I do this by staying still, resting my mind, and staying in the ever so very precious moment.
The reality of the matter is that I can only listen when I stay silent. And that goes for my mouth, but also my mind. If I can quiet my mind and give others the dignity of their experience, I can listen and do well for myself (which helps me in turn do good for others).
The BEST way for me to listen is letting other people finish their train of thought, then ask them questions. It can be the who, what, where, why and how questions, which will help them continue their points.
Another way to listen is to repeat the last two or three parts of their sentence. For example, if someone says ‘I am thinking about hiking up the mountain.’ I can say something like, ‘you liking hiking?’ This allows the person to continue their train of thought and at the same time gives them the ability to reassure their state of existence.
Another great way to listen is to not gossip, judge or jump to conclusions that are not true for others. For example, instead of saying that my friend is bad at communicating, I can turn that statement into my own experience instead. I can say something like this, ‘I feel like it is hard for me to communicate my feelings.’ See how that works? I redirect the conversation to myself to keep my side of the street clean. Gossip is the lowest form of communication and like JayZ says, when you diss me you diss yourself. It’s real bro.
What ways are you an active listener? What do you do to listen well?
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