Tessa Lynne is a therapist and author of The Invisible Choir.  She answers questions about spirituality and the afterlife that are interesting and moving all at once.

Here are some of her excerpts from Q&A on Quora below.

Is it true that people in heaven stay young and beautiful forever while those in hell are old and hideous? Do evil people become demons after death while good souls become angels?

There are no “people” in the spirit world (heaven), so we need to talk about spirits.

Spirits have no actual body, but they do assume the appearance of a human in order to better relate to the physical world. Their look could be compared to an avatar or a hologram.

New spirits are given a neutral appearance. Then, after a few physical lifetimes, they choose the look they will keep for eternity. This will usually be based on one of the lifetimes they have had or a combination of one or more of them.

A spirit can choose whether their appearance shows the effects of aging. Most choose to retain the appearance of an adult in the prime of life; some prefer to gradually age but at a much slower rate than humans do.

While a spirit might choose not to show the effects of aging, they cannot choose the equivalent of “botox.” The experiences and emotions of every lifetime are reflected on their faces just as they are in humans as they age.

When I discussed this topic with my sources, I asked if spirits tend to all look very attractive and was told that they reflect the full range of human appearance. I questioned that and explained the human practice of rating looks on a scale of one to ten. They considered that for a moment and then admitted that spirits would fall in the top half of that range.

Angel is a term used by humans. In the spirit world, they are known as Messengers. They are not separate entities from the spirits who take human lifetimes. It is a role they take between lifetimes after they have completed several and have some understanding of the physical world and human lives.

There is no hell — the spirits of all humans return to the spirit world, but those who have engaged in the worst behaviors will first be diverted to the wandering plane for a period of remedial work to help them be more effective at guiding a human life. They will lose some, or perhaps all, of their accumulated status and may have to repeat some, or perhaps all, of their previously learned lessons.

Some spirits do choose to align with what is called the dark side, but they are always free to return to the light and love of the Creator. This choice will usually come after a destructive lifetime, but it is not because of their actions in that life. It is the choice of that spirit. Those who elect to remain on the dark side cease to grow and evolve and eventually will wither away.

Is the ability to speak a proof that humans have spirits or souls which animals do not?

What is necessary for a lifeform to support the needs of a spirit is that they have the capacity to reason and make informed choices and also have the ability to communicate complex thoughts.

It is not necessary that a lifeform be able to speak to support a spiritual life — there are some worlds in which communication is through what we call extra-sensory perception.

At a point in the evolution of this planet, the Creator identified Homo sapiens as the lifeform with the greatest potential to support spiritual life and intervened in their development, including changes in the larynx to improve speech and in the cerebellum and other regions of the brain to improve cognitive function.

Animals do have spirits, but they are of a different type than human spirits, with the purpose of animating, protecting, and ensuring the perpetuation of the species. They do not attach to those lifetimes for the lessons to be learned, and they do not advance in the spirit world, where they have their own realm that is very different than that for human spirits.

If there is no marriage is heaven. Will I just love my husband in a brotherly way. Does that mean there will be nothing special about our love or connection in heaven?

The relationship your spirit and your husband’s spirit will have in the spirit world (heaven) will be based in part on any previous connection they have had and in part on the depth of your love in this lifetime.

While spirits do “spend quality time” with those they are closest to, and “stay in touch” with others, you cannot compare spiritual relationships to those in this world as they do not “live together” in the sense that humans do and because time, as we know it, does not existt.

For the most part, your spirits will each be focused on their own goals. First, completing the stages of transition back to the spirit world and then taking roles in keeping with their agendas for advancement in the spirit world, e.g., being a messenger, a guardian, or a council member.

It is possible that your spirits have shared one or more previous lifetimes and are what are known as parallel spirits, which are those who often return within the same time and location. As such, they are likely to do so again and to have occasional contact in the spirit world.

Another possibility is that your spirits are eternal spirits, which are those who have chosen to “be together” for all eternity for the purpose of helping to create and then nurturing and mentoring new spirits. It is these spiritual families who have the most enduring relationships in the spirit world and will most often be in contact.

If this is the first lifetime your spirits have shared, your human relationship might be the basis for them requesting to be parallel spirits in future lifetimes or at some point requesting to be eternal spirits (a choice made by fewer than a third of spirits).

Whether or not your spirits fit one of the above categories, how often they connect in the spirit world, and the strength of their connection, will be entirely up to them.

Link to these excerpts here.

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